Let’s pretend this is the best product description you’ve ever read. You’re wowed by my one-handed flip straw and triple-layered insulation, and awed by my color options. Now you’re faced with the most difficult decision of all… who deserves me? I have a flip-up straw. Now you see it. Now you don’t. Equally loved by magicians and germaphobes alike, my flip-up straw easily opens with one hand when you’re feeling parched, then tucks tidily away to help protect it from microscopic monsters. And full-size ones, too.